I want to start this post with a little story. Back in high school, I was talking to a friend about scripture reading and why I do it - and he didn't buy the whole "spirituality" thing at all. Finally, I just told him that reading my scriptures calms me down and helps me to feel peace. I promptly forgot about this experience until this morning.
You know when sometimes you start feeling like everything is falling apart, but if you stopped a looked around you would realize that nothing is actually attacking you? My mind was just going in circles this morning and taking my mood into a downward spiral. I was getting more and more anxious and nothing seemed to stop it. Then out of the blue, I got a great desire to literally run to my scriptures. Then this experience from high school came to mind, and I instantly felt peace. Even if you don't believe in the Spirit, returning to something that has brought you peace in the past is a great way to relieve tension. For me though, I believe in a little of both.
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This past weekend I caught up on my budgeting. I look at my checking and credit accounts, and record how much I spent on what. This ritual always makes me nervous, as money tends to be an abstract concept when you swipe your credit card that has very concert consequences. In Matthew 18, there is a story about a rich man who was doing this same sort of accounting and realized that a servant owed him money. The servant begged forgiveness and was forgiven, but then turned around and sent another servant to jail that owed him just a little bit of money.
I saw a lesson in this story I had not seen before about empathy. One of the age old questions is why do bad things happen, and I propose that bad thing happen so that we can learn empathy, and from empathy learn mercy and forgiveness. When the first servant was brought before his master, I can only imagine the anxiety he must have felt. When he turned and accused his fellow servant, I felt outrage at first - then shame at how many times I do that. But, like always, I felt hope afterwards and a deeper realization of why the atonement was necessary.
Christ is the ultimate example of one who empathizes - and I think that is why he is the ultimate source of peace and mercy. This morning, when I was freaking out about essentially nothing He was there like he always is to understand my fears and embarrassment. If He did not suffer in the garden, then I doubt He would be able to help me as much He does. Likewise, if we never suffered, I don't think we would be able to help others as much as we are able to.
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