Accountability

I guess to start out with, I think Alma 29:5 gives a pretty good definition of what it means to have accountability:

5 Yea, and I know that good and evil have come before all men; he that knoweth not good from evil is blameless; but he that knoweth good and evil, to him it is given according to his desires, whether he desireth good or evil, life or death, joy or remorse of conscience.

A few days ago, I had an interesting encounter. Ever since college, I've had a curiosity to get to know people who are different from me. I guess I kind of think that a good way to understand the world is to learn why people do what they do. A minister sat next to me on a plane, and I was curious as to what made his church different from the other churches in his town. Growing up LDS, which church you go to is strictly based on where you live - so it wasn't until a couple of years ago that this idea of "church shopping" became introduced to me. Also, a new Mormon church is built in a town when there is a need because of numbers. I know that protestant church's didn't work this way, so I've always been curious as to why a minister builds new church and how they get their congregation to choose to attend their church.

When he found out I was LDS, the conversation didn't go very well. The only piece of doctrine he told me, other than Mormons got it all wrong, was that he believed that when everyone dies, God is going to look at you and say "You made some mistakes, but come on in any ways."

This is a nice notion - kind of like some sort of big happy ending - but a phrase that comes to mind is "Mercy Cannot Rob Justice." God couldn't have gone to all the trouble of creating everything, creating rules and blessings conditioned on those rules, and then in the end decided it doesn't matter because he just loves us all so much. I'm not saying that God doesn't love us more than we could ever comprehend, but that for me it doesn't make sense and it doesn't ring true that I can read 21+ verse just from the Bible that clearly state that God expects us to live by his rules, and if we don't then we don't get the blessing.

The good news is that we don't have to do it all alone. We have Christ - and because of Christ's suffering in the garden and the cross we can return home to God without having to suffer the consequences of our sins. However, this is not a get out of jail free card either. Christ seemed to tell everyone he healed or forgave "to go and sin no more." I don't think it was a suggestion, I think it was a commandment. He commanded all to become baptized - not just suggested that it might be a good idea if we felt like it. The mercy Christ extends to us is conditioned on us choosing to follow him, and along with that is following his commandments as well. And excellent short movie on this topic is The Mediator.

A final thought on accountability is from D&C 82:3

3 For of him unto whom much is given much is required; and he who sins against the greater light shall receive the greater condemnation.

Everyone is accountable for what they have - and I hope that I'll figure out a way to better use to gifts and opportunities given me.

Account

Back again after a nice little hiatus!

I want to start this post with a little story. Back in high school, I was talking to a friend about scripture reading and why I do it - and he didn't buy the whole "spirituality" thing at all. Finally, I just told him that reading my scriptures calms me down and helps me to feel peace. I promptly forgot about this experience until this morning.

You know when sometimes you start feeling like everything is falling apart, but if you stopped a looked around you would realize that nothing is actually attacking you? My mind was just going in circles this morning and taking my mood into a downward spiral. I was getting more and more anxious and nothing seemed to stop it. Then out of the blue, I got a great desire to literally run to my scriptures. Then this experience from high school came to mind, and I instantly felt peace. Even if you don't believe in the Spirit, returning to something that has brought you peace in the past is a great way to relieve tension. For me though, I believe in a little of both.

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This past weekend I caught up on my budgeting. I look at my checking and credit accounts, and record how much I spent on what. This ritual always makes me nervous, as money tends to be an abstract concept when you swipe your credit card that has very concert consequences. In Matthew 18, there is a story about a rich man who was doing this same sort of accounting and realized that a servant owed him money. The servant begged forgiveness and was forgiven, but then turned around and sent another servant to jail that owed him just a little bit of money.

I saw a lesson in this story I had not seen before about empathy. One of the age old questions is why do bad things happen, and I propose that bad thing happen so that we can learn empathy, and from empathy learn mercy and forgiveness. When the first servant was brought before his master, I can only imagine the anxiety he must have felt. When he turned and accused his fellow servant, I felt outrage at first - then shame at how many times I do that. But, like always, I felt hope afterwards and a deeper realization of why the atonement was necessary.

Christ is the ultimate example of one who empathizes - and I think that is why he is the ultimate source of peace and mercy. This morning, when I was freaking out about essentially nothing He was there like he always is to understand my fears and embarrassment. If He did not suffer in the garden, then I doubt He would be able to help me as much He does. Likewise, if we never suffered, I don't think we would be able to help others as much as we are able to.